Well I'm not sure where to start..
I've been home for a couple days now and I still can't believe Summer Project is already over. Starting on Thursday morning it really sank in for me that we would be leaving soon. I told myself I would not cry or be a big baby about it because I missed my family and wanted to go home. That mindset didn't last long when I cried my eyes out after our last meeting Thursday morning. I think what I will miss the most is the spiritual atmosphere that we were surrounded by that does not feel able to exist back here in NC.
By this I guess I mean that it was easy for me to go up to a girl on project and have a conversation about something I'm struggling with spiritually, ask a guy a deep question about his feelings (being serious) and get a serious answer, or walk up to a staff member and ask them what does life look like fully devoted to God. These things you will not find at home, and that was what I was not ready for.
Who do you say I Am?
--The last week was focused on what we had learned all summer and putting it into perspective of what we will actually do with it?
One of our student project directors, Ethan, gave us a good analogy of this: Right now its like we are sitting on the doorstep of Summer Project looking out into the world we will go back to at home and wondering what it will look like. We have two options:
1) we can tell ourselves that we can't grow outside of project and this whole summer of growth will never happen again.
2) or we can take everything we have learned, talked about, seen God do and experienced back with us to our homes, schools, and communities.
We have to think of our past choices we have made. Did we stand up for God and for the one who has changed our life or did we say "screw it" and throw in the towel of our faith? I'm not saying we won't mess us. Jesus' disciples who walked through life with him still doubted him and who he was, but we are called to still follow him with our life choices.
When we think about trusting Him with every choice we make it seems scary, but WHY?!
Why is it hard to trust the one who created you, shaped your body, placed the hairs on your head, knows your thoughts and motives for everything, created your life plan, cares for the desires of your heart and most of all loves you??
We trust things in this world that are so unworthy: college degrees, boyfriends, people, strangers, workplaces, retirement funds, saving accounts to support us but we won't even give God (GOD) the spot he deserves in our life....why?
**Matthew 6:33**
So, I ask myself as I leave project--
Will I throw in the towel and live the life that the world is screaming at me to live?
or will I trust that he will provide for me?
"Were not doubting that God will do what is best for us, were wondering how painful the best will turn out to be." -C.S Lewis
So, I was already lacking sleep when I decided to stay up all night for my 6am flight Friday morning, I did not realized what Friday would hold. With a lot of struggles to get home on Friday my temper, patience, and trust for God was already being tested. I missed my flight, was on a seat wait list for 3 flights that I did not get on, had my gates changed at the last min., and ended up having to leave my flying partner (Amanda) and fly the rest of the way home alone after spending 7 hours in the Atlanta, GA airport. >> This was God completely telling me, "here is your life to come outside of project: choices to make, confusion, stress, people to deal with, and the option to trust me or to act upon it yourself."
I can honestly say that it was not Summer Project in Chicago that has changed the way I view my future, but it is God and the Gospel. I will continue blogging as much as I can while I begin my 4th year at ECU.
I want you to know that I'm trusting God that this summer was not just a spiritual high that you get on Sundays, or at a Christian camp, but it is something I will carry back with me to school, into life, and everyday to trust God to use for his kingdom.
Thank you for reading and supporting me always!
Love, Danielle Cassidy
Sunday, August 12, 2012
Sunday, August 5, 2012
WEEK #10 !?!?
This is my last week in Chicago with my Summer Project family. These 10 weeks have flown by and I am not quite ready to say goodbye. I have gotten so close to all the students here. We are together everyday, share meals together, study, worship and pray together daily. I will miss this amazing community but God has called me to return home and take what I have learned back to ECU's campus. There is a time for everything-- Ecclesiastes 3 <3
All of us here from ECU have been meeting once a week to specifically pray for our campus for when we return home.--Please pray with us that God will make a way for us to get prepared for the upcoming year, planning how to help freshman move into dorms, getting to know them, serving, reaching out, and providing a welcoming week for students. We pray God will allow us to see him working on our campus this year even more than last year with cookouts, outreach, Thursday meetings, freshman bible studies, and more. Thanks for your prayers!!
"I Am Love"
This week we looked at how God is Love. I know what your thinking, God is loving, caring, giving and gracious. Yes, he is loving but what I have learned this week is that He is love.
Love is not something God does but it is who He is. All things good and loving on Earth are from him and created by him. He is the creator and our source of love. We would not know how to love if he did not first love us. 1 John 4:16-17
Our leadership speaker on this topic (Anne) told us how when she was younger she was a very active gymnast. She practiced with a personal coach 8-10 hours a day, everyday for years. She was a performer for her coach and she worked hard to please her and get her approval for everything she did. One day she walks into practice and her coach was not there. She went ahead and practiced without her being there and returned the next day, again she did not show up. Days and a week passed and she never showed until another coach had to tell Anne that her coach had moved. Anne was left feeling like she did something wrong and as if she was not good enough for her coach. She was alone, abandoned, and with no hope to ever continue training.
This is how we treat God sometimes. We perform in front of him with our good works, going to church, praying, reading our bible, being nice to people, and hiding our true broken, worn down feelings from life. We possibly feel that if we do not do these things routinely then God will be mad or love us less. This is not true. God is different! He is not our coach or trainer, he is our father!
As Anne will now tell you, "God does not walk away when our performance is not up to his standards--he is with us even when we can't perform at all."
So if this is love, why can't we grasp it? Its because in today's world the word Love is overused, broken, beat-up, twisted, and based on feelings and emotions. But Love from God is different. It is:
-Sacrificial - 1 John 4:9 and John 3:16 ..He didn't just die in the place of your and my sins but he died in the place of you and me! Your actual self!
-Unconditional- 1 John 4:10 and Romans 5:8
"God doesn't want something or anything from us, he just wants us." -C.S Lewis
-Unbreakable- 1 John 4:13 and Ephesians 1: 13-14 .. We are marked with his seal..we have the holy spirit to guide us until he comes back!
-Commanded- Ephesians 4:2 God commands us to then, "be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love."
--Pray that I enjoy this week to the fullest and build even deeper relationships with the students here this last week. I will be flying home Friday Aug.10th at 6am.
Prayers for safety and for getting a smooth transition from here, to Whiteville, and back to Greenville are really appreciated. See you all soon hopefully !!
In God's LOVE, Danielle
This is my last week in Chicago with my Summer Project family. These 10 weeks have flown by and I am not quite ready to say goodbye. I have gotten so close to all the students here. We are together everyday, share meals together, study, worship and pray together daily. I will miss this amazing community but God has called me to return home and take what I have learned back to ECU's campus. There is a time for everything-- Ecclesiastes 3 <3
All of us here from ECU have been meeting once a week to specifically pray for our campus for when we return home.--Please pray with us that God will make a way for us to get prepared for the upcoming year, planning how to help freshman move into dorms, getting to know them, serving, reaching out, and providing a welcoming week for students. We pray God will allow us to see him working on our campus this year even more than last year with cookouts, outreach, Thursday meetings, freshman bible studies, and more. Thanks for your prayers!!
"I Am Love"
This week we looked at how God is Love. I know what your thinking, God is loving, caring, giving and gracious. Yes, he is loving but what I have learned this week is that He is love.
Love is not something God does but it is who He is. All things good and loving on Earth are from him and created by him. He is the creator and our source of love. We would not know how to love if he did not first love us. 1 John 4:16-17
Our leadership speaker on this topic (Anne) told us how when she was younger she was a very active gymnast. She practiced with a personal coach 8-10 hours a day, everyday for years. She was a performer for her coach and she worked hard to please her and get her approval for everything she did. One day she walks into practice and her coach was not there. She went ahead and practiced without her being there and returned the next day, again she did not show up. Days and a week passed and she never showed until another coach had to tell Anne that her coach had moved. Anne was left feeling like she did something wrong and as if she was not good enough for her coach. She was alone, abandoned, and with no hope to ever continue training.
This is how we treat God sometimes. We perform in front of him with our good works, going to church, praying, reading our bible, being nice to people, and hiding our true broken, worn down feelings from life. We possibly feel that if we do not do these things routinely then God will be mad or love us less. This is not true. God is different! He is not our coach or trainer, he is our father!
As Anne will now tell you, "God does not walk away when our performance is not up to his standards--he is with us even when we can't perform at all."
So if this is love, why can't we grasp it? Its because in today's world the word Love is overused, broken, beat-up, twisted, and based on feelings and emotions. But Love from God is different. It is:
-Sacrificial - 1 John 4:9 and John 3:16 ..He didn't just die in the place of your and my sins but he died in the place of you and me! Your actual self!
-Unconditional- 1 John 4:10 and Romans 5:8
"God doesn't want something or anything from us, he just wants us." -C.S Lewis
-Unbreakable- 1 John 4:13 and Ephesians 1: 13-14 .. We are marked with his seal..we have the holy spirit to guide us until he comes back!
-Commanded- Ephesians 4:2 God commands us to then, "be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love."
--Pray that I enjoy this week to the fullest and build even deeper relationships with the students here this last week. I will be flying home Friday Aug.10th at 6am.
Prayers for safety and for getting a smooth transition from here, to Whiteville, and back to Greenville are really appreciated. See you all soon hopefully !!
In God's LOVE, Danielle
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